When Momma Ain’t Happy…

We know this one, right? When momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.  

Such a true statement. 

As moms we can either use our influence to make our homes a wonderful place, or we can allow our negativity to make our home into a place our children or spouses avoid whenever possible.  While we all have rough days, I imagine we all desire to have a happy home and be a joyful person that people want to be around.    

I have met many supermoms. They are amazing! Their kids do awesome things and they do awesome things with their kids.  Their energy seems boundless and they always seem so positive.  I am not a supermom.  I have days that I would rather just wipe off the calendar and not speak of again. Definitely not pretty.

Now, I think the supermoms have figured something out ahead of the rest of us. 

What might that be?

It is good and necessary to spend time on yourself.  When we are so battle worn and weary that we are unable to care for ourselves, we automatically take it out on our families.  We need to care for our bodies and minds, so that we are able to be the positive pillars in our families’ lives.  While I cannot avoid every bad day, I have learned that I need to do some things just for me.  This pregnancy has been exhausting.  While I can’t always get to bed as early as I’d like, I do allow myself to sleep in a little a few days a week.  I get up when my 3 year old gets up, rather than a half hour or hour beforehand. While I may get less things done on those mornings, my family appreciates that I got more sleep! I am slower to criticize and be negative, and I start the day on a much kinder note. 

Secondly, I need stress relief.  I am naturally a person that holds onto stress and I take things to heart that my easy-going husband would just let roll off his back.  Exercise is my biggest stress relief.  Although I usually teach several fitness classes during the week, I also need time to workout on my own.  Whether it is putting on headphones and zoning out while strength training, or running outdoors and listening to nature, I need time to process life and put it together in my head.  Is this time usually spent away from my family? Yes. While I love my family, I would much rather exercise on my own or with a friend whenever possible.  Does it seem selfish to spend this time on myself? Sometimes. Although I try to make my workouts early in the morning or late at night, they will occasionally impact the time I have with my family.  

Is it worth it? Yes.  Having time to myself to release stress and think through life is important.  I am calmer after a good workout, and can fight through issues on a kickboxing bag so that I don’t take out the problem on my husband or my kids.  

I need to be attentive to my primary triggers - sleep, stress, and exercise.  When I get enough sleep, it is easy to exercise, I am less stressed, I eat much healthier and I feel good. When I let stress overwhelm me or exhaustion overtake me, I eat poorly, feel poorly and take it out on those around me. 

For me to be able to love on my family, I have to put some TLC into my own well-being.  While your triggers may be much different than mine, finding those key areas you need to focus on might well make you and your home into a much happier place. 

Because…when Mom is happy, everyone’s happy. 

 *I know that finding time to yourself can be the biggest issue, especially for single moms or those with husbands that travel often.  Try to use your lunch break at work to get out on your own for a walk, or employ a relative to watch your children so you can get away for a bit. See Fitting in Fitness for more ideas on how to make exercise work into your life.

Get OUTDOORS for Your Health! (Part II)

 There are an infinite number of outdoor activities, but oftentimes we draw a blank when we have the opportunity to get out the door.  Whether you are by yourself, with younger children, or spending time with your entire family, I hope you’ll enjoy and utilize this large list of outdoor activities in a safe and fun way.

By yourself (or with your hubby or friend!):

1. Simply sit outdoors, take some deep breaths, and enjoy the beauty of nature.
2. Trade the gym for the park one day a week. Enlist some friends and have a outdoor bootcamp.
3. Check into dates for the next meteor shower and spend an evening stargazing (if you live in a well-lit city you may want to head towards a more rural area for better viewing). (http://stardate.org/nightsky/meteors)
4. Try your hand at gardening.  You can improve your flower beds or veggie intake during the summer months, while you soak up a little sun.
5. Plan to be outdoors everyday for a walk or a run—take your dog along!  Layer your clothing during the colder months, don’t simply stay inside.
6. Sign up for a sports league that meets outdoors during the warmer months.  Volleyball, softball, basketball, and soccer are all popular sport activities—check with nearby recreation departments for their schedules.
7. Go canoeing, kayaking, swimming, bicycling, skiing, snowshoeing, ice skating, or roller-blading.
8. Grab a camera and head to a special location.  Catch a sunset, fresh snow, or fall trees in a new light.

With Younger Children:

1. Have a picnic.
2. Grab a blanket and watch the clouds go by overhead.
3. Play Angry Birds with water balloons : http://www.notimeforflashcards.com/2011/05/angry-birds-inspired-water-balloon-game.html
4. Pretend to be animals and ‘walk like a bear’ or ‘jump like a frog’.
5. Pull out the sidewalk chalk and work on letters, shapes, and colors. For slightly older children, have them create roads for their bicycles complete with stores, ponds, trees, and houses.
6. Enjoy bubbles, trikes, bikes, hopscotch, jump rope, Frisbees, and balls –then use your imagination and see what games you can construct using those favorite outdoor toys.
7. Make your own ‘golf’ course with a small ball and plastic cups.
8. Wash the car… or have the kiddos make their own toy car wash.
9. Create an outdoor scavenger hunt. 
10. Play in the mud, puddles, sprinkler, leaves, snow, or dandelions.
11. Fingerpaint --Or use your feet on the driveway instead!
12. Collect worms, insects, frogs, butterflies, or other critters.
13. Grab a blanket and read some stories in the backyard.
14. Create your own fun fitness obstacle course.
15. Gather leaves, blades of grass, acorns etc. for a nature collage.
16. Plant a flower, vegetable plant, or seeds.
17. Go sledding or make a fort in the snow.
18. Set up a bird feeder and count the birds (or squirrels) that come to eat.
19. Go fishing. Children don’t need a license to fish and it is great fun if you don’t mind the hooks and worms.
20. Play in the rain. Send your kiddos outdoors with umbrellas, boots, and raincoats.  Just be careful to watch for lightning.

With your entire family:

1. Try your hand at geocaching, a real-world treasure hunt using your GPS.  Check out www.geocaching.com for more info and cache locations.
2. Take your meals outdoors.  My kids love eating outside, whether at home or on a picnic at the park. Plus, the cleanup is often a little easier! Surprise them with a summer morning trip to the beach/pool for breakfast.
3. Do yard cleanup together. Whether picking up sticks or cleaning up leaves, our yards often present opportunities for fitness and fun – we just need to get creative when we enlist our children’s help!
4. Do some shopping at outdoor farmers’ markets.  Enjoy the fresh air and extra veggies.
5. Go for a family hike in a neat location. Even teenagers that aren’t interested in nature might perk up if there are rocks to climb or a waterfall to reach.
6. Go camping or cabining in the woods. Or, if you don’t enjoy staying overnight out in nature, enjoy a state or local park for the daytime hours.
7. Pick apples, strawberries, blueberries, pumpkins and more! Start with selecting your product and then see what fun and healthy foods you can create.
8. Be an outdoor tourist in your own city.  See how many unique outdoor activities you can fit in one day or afternoon. Ditch the car and grab bicycles or simply walk!

Do you have more suggestions for fun outdoor activities?  Leave a comment below with your favorites! 

 

Resources: 

Schuman, C. (2011). 10 Unique Family Activities: Tired of the same old routine? Spend quality time with your family while trying some fresh and fun activities. Parents. Retrieved September 18, 2013. http://www.parents.com/fun/activities/unique-family-activities/#page=5 

 Walters, J. (n.d.). Why Getting Outside is So Good for You: Are you Nature-Deprived? Sparkpeople. Retrieved on September 11, 2013, from http://www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellness_articles.asp?id=1680&page=2

 McDonald, A. (March 7, 2012). 50 Simple Outdoor Activities for Kids. No Time for Flash Cards. Retrieved September 18, 2013. http://www.notimeforflashcards.com/2012/03/50-simple-outdoor-activities-for-kids.html

 Photos courtesy of Microsoft Office